Not how i remember them....

Christmas parties

My diary is getting more and more full with Xmas parties- yey!

It kind of started last Wednesday when my boss had his 40th birthday and we all went to the Embassy Club. It was loads of fun, drinking champagne and dancing to cheesy songs (I think the last was dreadlock holiday). My friend Wayne gave us girls a lift to our houses at 3.30am before driving all the way back to Essex (bless him!). And he had to put up with three of us in the back screeching "I've had the time of my life". Shortly after our rendition of this Dirty Dancing classic Jack, my other workmate was sick out of the car. Surely we weren't that bad!

Had a really nice weekend at home and caught up with some people I hadn't seen for ages which was nice. Went to Barbados nightclub (scary) and Club 54 (they are actually playing music I was dancing to 10 years ago in there). Went for a drive along the coast on Sunday afternoon, it was really nice to get some sea air, makes me feel healthy for five minutes atleast!

Going to my friend Clayton's for thanksgiving dinner on Thursday and off to France this weekend. Off to bed now, Jerry Maguire is on, another cheesy film I love cos I am such a diehard romantic!!

Halloween Party

Went to a wicked Halloween party on Saturday with all the old crowd from Glamorgan, some who I haven't seen for years! Me and Rhona weren't really paying attention when we received the invite. We were supposed to show up as an icon, hence Tupac and Che above. Instead we went as...wait for it...a witch and a devil. No wonder we got a few puzzled looks when we arrived!

I drank loads of punch, moved onto the spirits, then my mate Tim (Che) was feeding me rum and ginger beer. Surprisingly I actually made it home, even felt relatively sober actually! We played Roxanne at one point, it could have got nasty but that was the only drinking game we played.


Off to the Comedy Store tonight we my bro, his girlfriend and her brother which should be fun. Then got a busy week at work, helping out one of our photographers at the National Television awards and hopefully photographing Razorlight on wed night.

Have a accidentally joined a dating website?

Hmmm, I received an email the other day inviting me to join a website a bit like friends reunited...trouble is, I reckon it's a dating website in disguise.

It's basicly people cruising around the website, then they can send you a message saying "oh hi just wanted to say hello" or something. Last night I got one of these messages from a guy. He wanted to be my mate, so I said yeah (he looked kind of cute). Then I get a message saying let's go out for a drink and can I pls give him my number. Well sorry but who are you again?, i don't believe we have had any form of conversation and have i just joined some dating website?

The other thing that annoys me is if I decide I want to look for ex's, it'll tell them I have been looking at their page! What's that all about!!

Think I'll stick to myspace...
!

Leggings = fashion disaster?

I'm not really a massively stylish person. I try...sometimes...but I am not a dedicated follower and I certainly don't get this leggings thing!

To me they are almost as bad as shellsuits. I remember wearing them when I was younger and looking back in horror at old photos, hardly believing I wore such a thing (surely my mum made me?!?) There were three girls on the train the other day, wearing them underneath dresses and it looked like some kind of bad school uniform. The sooner this craze fades, the better I think.

Been feeling a bit ropey these last few days, got a cough and cold starting. I still managed to heave myself off to Southampton shopping for the day on Saturday (bought a gorgeous purple coat). I have also ordered the Sex and the City boxset series 1-6. I think I may become anti social, lock myself away with chocolate and wine and watch the lot!! I started watching a few episodes (stupidly of the 6th series!) when I was house sitting a few weeks ago. I am now hooked and can't wait for it to arrive!

Few bits happening this week... meeting my friend Josh tomorrow for some food and a catch up. Then on Thursday am taking pics at the Keane gig. Otherwise have somehow joined this new website WAYN (not a patch on myspace) but I do seem to have all these random guys sending me messages which is fun! Had a dream last night about someone I haven't seen for six years. It's wierd when that happens, you forget about people for years, then you have a vivid dream and you remember them all over again.

I am about to watch a documentary on the Amityville Horror. Is this a wise idea just before bed???? I'll let you know...

full time employment

I am now just a few weeks back into full time work again. I'm missing the lie-ins, let's be honest, but it's nice to do something different.

I've been trying to still take photos atleast once a week. Last week I took myself off to my first gig (to photograph..not just watch). I went along to see the goo goo dolls, I was really excited cos I wanted to see them perform "Iris", one of my fave songs. My plan however backfired when I was tol:

a. we were only allowed to take pics of the first three songs (iris was about number 10)
b. no flash allowed (no great surprise)
c. After the first three songs we had to leave

So no live version of Iris then but I was pretty pleased with my pictures. I may be going to an Orson gig tomorrow, am waiting to hear. I'll start off with the smaller gigs and hopefully build up to some bigger ones when I get used to it.

Otherwise went out with Rhona at the weekend. I am getting very bored of talking to and meeting rude and boring men. One guy we met gave us a history of tidal power, another walked off halfway through a conversation (v rude), another was 40, annoying, thought he was funny but really wasn't. I'm starting to feel a bit run down so I think I might have a boozy few drinks after work on Friday, then chill out at the weekend in front of the TV. Hmmm that's the plan but hey, let's be honest, it may not happen...

Getting sorted

So I have FINALLY moved all my stuff into my new flat. It took most of my family to help me do it but at last my room is taking shape! My mum surprised me by announcing she was coming over to help me last week. She arrived Friday, we painted my room that night, put up new curtains on Saturday and I have now unpacked all my stuff, yey!

The exciting news of last week was that I got offered and have accepted a job at Matrix Synidication. I basicly look after the photographers, decide where some of them are going (celeb parties etc). I get to see all the pictures coming in and see the whole process of them being sold to magazines and newspapers. I can even go and take pictures myself if I want and went out to take some of Gordon Ramsay last week! He's a really funny guy.

So basicly had a quiet weekend with my mum and bro. Had an amazing meal out on Friday night at a place called the Blue Elephant. It had bridges, waterfalls and orchids, all inside the restaurant. The food was pricey but amazing. Had a fab meal out on Saturday too, then went to watch World Trade Center. The weekend wasn't as much of a piss up as normal but really chilled, which was just what I fancied.

Can't even change a bloody lightbulb!

I am offically rubbish....

I can't change a lightbulb...and I am not sure what I am doing wrong. Perhaps the light fitting is too high? I struggled for ages, before realising I couldn't get it unscrewed! oh and I had bought the wrong bulb!

I then attempted to cook an omlette and forgot to add cheese! Duh Doughnut!

I have so much to do at the moment. My stuff is still in storage so I need to collect that at the weekend as well as paint my room. The landlord says I need to paint it magnolia, I say f**k that am I painting it magnolia.

My job at Matrix is proving fun. I get to hear all the showbiz gossip and Heat is now old news by the time I read it! I am basicly deciding which events the photographers cover and assign them to jobs. It's for two weeks and after that, well who knows, we shall see.

My friend Clayton is cooking for me tomorrow and he is cooking my favourite Taco's!!! Yey!

Oh and in case you have decided I am a real thicko after reading the first few lines of this blog, I am officially not, as I passed my masters today. Hurrah!! A drinking sesh needs planning I feel!

Nothing is Perfect

If you get the chance click on the link below and have a listen to "Nothing is Perfect".

I think it's a really beautiful song being sung by Sam Warren, who sadly died in July this year. Sam's friend Chris wants people to hear their music (Chris is on guitar) and I think that's a fab idea!

http://www.myspace.com/paranoiddelusion1

In my new flat!

Well I have moved in to my new flat!!! It was kind of wierd, the room looks really bare and I don't feel I can make it my own until I get my stuff out of storage. The location is fab...Fulham 5 mins walk. There's a somerfield 2 seconds away, WH Smith, Peacocks ( apparently the new Primark- i will let you know!).

So on Sat night, myself, Claire, Rhona and Em's hit Fulham Broadway. Went and ate Thai food, then found a pub where we stayed until midnight. At that point I bailed, feeling very tired, whilst the girls headed to Thai Square, the follies of Putney- well sort of! I then got settled in my room, was going off to sleep and my phone rang. It was the most hilarious late night, drunken phone-call I have had for a while, which began with the boy in question giving me a running commentary of how he was too drunk to get into his house. The conversation was an interesting one and I was kindly invited to Croydon in the early hours (funnily enough I declined). Lets just say someone will probably be feeling embarassed today, if they remember what they were talking about in the first place!

I start 2 weeks work tomorrow, at a picture agency. I'm pretty excited but also a bit scared! It's going to be such a shock to the system doing full-time work again. I really have adapted to the student lifestyle a little too much! In the meantime I am also due to hear about another job. Just as long as I do something I enjoy, I'll be happy!

Waiting

Well I'm sitting in a posh hotel lobby on the internet...again...

Have found a flat, 18 viewings later but I won't quite believe it until I have got the keys on Saturday. It's in Fulham, sounds swish but it also means the most expensive council tax, boo hoo. Not sure how I will get on living with strangers but I have done it befor,well for the last year in fact and we all seem to still be speaking! (In fact one of my flatmates kindly texted at 4.58am this morning!). It's the gamble you take with any flatshare I guess so we shall have to see.

I am waiting to hear about a job at the moment. I was due to hear yesterday, now it looks like tomorrow. I just want to know!! My dad kindly took me for a bite to eat last night and calmed me down (well the red wine did). What will be will be as they say. I'll just have to wait it out.

Job hunt

Today I am trying to be productive. I have written to all the photo agencies I can think of asking for a job. So far, one has replied (the one I am doing work for already) and they have said they will bear me in mind.

So following on from the Freddie pics, I am going to be taking pics of wait for it...Grace from Big Brother and Lisa Scott Lee on Sunday. They're doing some pink aerobics for Breast Cancer. Should be amusing!

Saw quite a nice flat yesterday. Location is brilliant, near West Brompton tube, room is lovely, kitchen small, lounge nice but bathroom isn't that great. The room is perfect and I have said I am interested but now I am not sure. Should I hold out for something nicer but further away? It's so tricky...and in a few days I need to have moved out of the flat I am in.

Went on a date last night, first time in ages. It was actually quite nice. Went to a few bars on the South Bank, wondered past the London Eye all lit up. The poor guy missed his train back to Croydon though and had to get a cab. I felt really bad, well for about five mins! Anyway being a gunners fan, he appreciated my freddie pics and I let him have a couple.

Out tomorrow night with SJ, can't wait to see her. Think I will snuggle up, cook a nice meal and watch the Sex and the City boxset tonight. Make the most of my last night in the luxury flat!

Freddie baby

Freddie is GORGEOUS...I can confirm, as I took this pic yesterday. I have started doing freelance work for a London photo agency. My first job was Terry Wogan launching his new book, the second was Freddie Ljungberg doing some Calvin Klein press conference. Once I have taken the pics, they go onto the agency's website to be sold to newspapers and magazines. Sadly you only get paid if you sell them, which isn't always likely to happen. I'm enjoying it so far though.

Seen 15 flats but not "the one" yet. I'm not looking for anything incredible but every one seems to have had one prob, either not close enough to a tube, room not big enough or too expensive. Oh well gotta keep trying!

Lost in London

I knew I would end up going clubbing last night...

I was saying earlier in the evening I would aim to get the last tube home, it's safer, more convenient blah blah blah. Nah I stayed out in Putney's very own version of Follies until about 3am. I got on a bus at the end of the night, managed to miss my stop. Wandered around I think Hyde Park Corner area, really really lost. Ended up spending a tenner to get a rickshaw thing back. Chatted to the Polish driver all about how great it would be to go travelling. Was on my way back to the flat, thinking about how much money I had spent when I found a tenner, yey!

It was a funny night though had deep and meaningful discussions with boys about why they wear chunky silver chains around their necks. Some guy gave me his business card at one point, very formal. Fell over...again...this time in front of an audience as I was on my way to the toilet.
I shouldn't be let out at night...

Ok back to my life plan, these are my aims for this week:

1. Find a flat. I have a week before I have to leave the Westminster pad
2. Possibly book to come home for a week or two
3. Find a job. An interview for one of the hundreds I have applied for would be a start
4. Start this podasting stuff. I am to become rich from it

Hmmm well if I can aim to do atleast one of those instead of checking myspace every five mins, talking to people on msn and refreshing the gumtree flatshare page every 2 secs, it would be a start!

Tired and still flat hunting...

I'm sitting here drinking poison wine. I tried all evening not to buy a bottle but after a rubbish day flathunting, I just had to. I am house sitting for my friend in Westminster, literally right by the London Eye. I hopped on over to the newsagents/off licence and bought a suspicious looking bottle of "Italian Pinot Grigio" for £3.99, the cheapest in the shop. The guy smirked as he sold it to me. I could practically read his mind, "You cheap student buying that cheap nasty plonk." Oh well it's sort of drinkable.

So I am in this flat for a week while the search continues. The first flat I went to view today was the grimmest so far. Actually I didn't see it, no one was in but the following put me off;

1. In a scummy area, in a scummy block
2. No lock on front door, there may as well have been a sign up saying "rob us all"
3. There were people screaming in neighbouring flats
4. It smelt of wee

Oh and the person who was meant to be showing me round, wasn't in, so there's a problem right there. I consoled myself with a foamy coffee and massacred a muffin in Cafe Nero. Then met Claire, who bless her, listened to me whine, told me to look for jobs in New York and bought me a cranberry juice. She is such a star.

Decided I am going to chase up my job applications now as I am getting fed up of hearing nothing. So called Bloomberg to see if they had my application. Got put through to the New York office, turns out they haven't so had to re-submit. Where the hell did it go? The depths of cyber space I presume....

I need a get rich quick scheme, or maybe I'll buy a ticket for Euro millions tomorrow night...now that's an idea...

Flat hunting - arghhhh!

So it's a day a million of flat hunting and still no place I can call home.

I have seen 10 places now. Most have been really nice and one I really liked fell through. (The news was broken via text message - a bit mean I thought).

So the search resumes... In the meantime my life goes into storage tomorrow ( in a place in Harrow-concerning). I am going to move into my friend Peter's place, right by the London eye (gorgeous flat) for a week. I hope I find somewhere in the next 7 days.

It's wierd it's all over now. I am really keen on leaving uni (the bastards have now cut off the internet). It's been a year where I have certainly learnt a lot about myself, had good times, had not so good times, but I look back on it really fondly. I kind of feel I have been a first year all over again (nothing will compare to Glamorgan) but it's been great. I'm a lot more chilled, have met the most amazing people, some true friends for life this year.

It's been worth it just for that.

I'm in Heaven...quite literally

Twas my birthday party last night and it went a bit like this...

went to a bar...drank lots of wine and cocktails....had a birthday cake...went across the bridge to a piano bar...drank some more until 2.30am...chatted to a homeless man and advised him against bringing drugs into Guernsey...(don't believe he ever suggested doing such a thing in the first place!)...wanted to go home...changed my mind...went to Heaven...lots of cute men...all gay...what a waste...escaped from the dancefloor and found a food outlet in the club...ordered potato wedges with sour cream and ketchup...sneaked back onto the dancefloor...get chatted up by 18 year old Australian...I swear I just saw him snogging a boy earlier...left the club and got into cab...6 of us I believe at this point...feel asleep in the taxi...got back to uni at 6am...fell out of the taxi...all my presents fall onto the floor...try holding a conversation in the kitchen...it's proving tough...contact lenses are sticking to my eyes...pass out in bed...wake up...feel like crap.

Embarrasing things I did...

Fell up the stairs on westminster bridge
walked into a sign
danced on stage in Heaven
mouthed the words to Eurythmics "Sweet Dreams" in Heaven
requested "Purple Rain" in a piano bar...and they played it

All in all it was a very funny night... A few people didn't show which I was dissapointed about.
Some people I didn't expect to show up did and they had a wicked time. I have now been to the three main gay clubs in London...GAY...Guetto and Heaven.... How am I meant to meet a boyfriend this way?! On the plus side my gaydar has been enhanced...reckon I can spot 'em a mile off now!

Lovely birthday

I had such a nice birthday. Three of my flatmates came into my room after midnight to say happy birthday and give me pressies and cards. I woke up to find 6 text messages from my brother, mum, dad, brother's girlfriend and two of my best mates! Ahh to feel loved...

Got about 25 cards and loads of messages on the internet and texts througout the day. A few people surprised me by not getting in touch when they knew full well that it was my birthday. That spoke volumes...and has been mentally noted...

At lunchtime I got my flatmates into the kitchen, I opened Bucks Fizz, had some cakes and made them watch me open my cards and presents. The funny thing is they all were busy working on their disserations as the deadline was the day after. I don't think they were particularly in the mood but did it for me which was sweet of them.

In the afternoon I went shopping with the influx of cash I received. Bought some hot pink underwear ( really nice), two tops possibly for Sat night. Met two friends from school that night, we went for food along the river. It was a really nice evening and generally a really nice day. It was always going to be wierd being away from home but I feel I made the most of it and made a point of telling everyone I came across that it was my birthday!!!

Am now looking forward to Sat night. Booked some tables at a cocktail bar in central. Got random different groups of people going along so no idea whether that will work or not.... Fingers crossed, I just want to have a nice chilled out night...then ahhhhhhh! Monday I finish my masters...how scary is that!

LA dreams

Spotted a job ad today and got VERY excited. It was advertising for a "Trainee Celebrity Photojournalist", wait for it...based in Los Angeles! I practically jumped off my chair, started imagining my oscars outfit, bumping into hollywood heartthrobs in starbucks etc. So I sent off my CV and five bullet points as to why I should have the job. I got an email back really quickly, the guy explained the job involved "car follows" and "stakeouts", a lot of hanging around outside nightclubs etc. Hmmm...not quite what I had in mind. I don't mind that kind of stuff but it's not really the direction I see myself going. I have to say mum sounded pretty horrified when I suggested the idea!!

So back to the drawing board in the job hunt. I still really want to go travelling too, especially after talking to my friend Kate the other night. Most of our uni friends have done all that but we haven't, I think I would regret it if I didn't take the plunge. Hmm we'll see...

Making good progress with my project on Margaret, the UK's loyalist royalist. She's so funny, I just hope the lecturers like the project and I pass, a merit would be good too!

Off to meet schoolfriends tomorrow which will be nice, also need to suss out a drinking venue for next Saturday night. Will head for Soho or Covent Garden I reckon. It's going to be wierd, my first birthday away from home! can't believe that...and I'm gonna be 27, ouch!

Brief Encounter

I wasn't sure whether to write about this or not but I figure it's been on my mind for the last few weeks and if I am deciding to write a blog, then I may as well say what I am thinking.

A month ago, after I had been to my friend's wedding, I came out of a club in Guernsey and was waiting for my friends. It was 2am, I was wearing the turquoise dress I had worn all day to the wedding with my high heeled shoes ( now killing me by the way!). A guy started talking to me and I turned around. He was literally the tallest person I think I have ever met. My jaw dropped and I simply said "My God! How tall are you!." He laughed and said 6ft 10. 6FT 10!!! and I am 5ft 2! It amused me so much I got my friend to take 2 photos of us together. So then we chatted, he told me his name which I promptly forgot ( alchohol), he told me he was a barman and then he asked for my number. I happily gave it to him, gave him a kiss on the cheek and went to get my taxi, giggling the whole way back.

When I got back home, I got a text message "Hey it's the tall guy you met before!, you wanna go for a drink sometime?" We had some text banter which ended with him saying "By the way your gorgeous!". I snuggled into bed thinking I had the best day for ages and that comment just topped it off.

I woke with the hangover from hell and found another message on my phone from the tall guy. "Hey do you wanna go for a drink then, it would be awesome if u said yes!". Presuming it had been sent in the early hours I left it and didn't reply. The next evening I got another text message from the tall guy inviting me to his 21st in two days time. 21? Hmmm bit too young as recent experience proved...(another story). I politely said I was busy (which I was). We exchanged a few more text messages, the last was me saying sorry, but too busy to meet up and wishing him a happy birthday.

In the days leading up to his birthday I thought about him a few times. Who is he? How nice that he said I was gorgeous! I kind of hoped I would maybe bump into him when I was out the following weekend, we could talk a bit more.

So here's where it all gets strange....He went out on his birthday, sounds like he had a great time but then there was an accident. He fell in the marina in the early hours and drowned.

I heard about it the day after, it was all over the news but they didn't say who it was. That evening I was round at the house of a friend who used to work with. He was telling me about how some 21 year old died on his birthday and as soon as he said "he was 6ft 10 you know" my heart sank. It all fell into place.

Over the next week I found myself getting upset. Driving in the car, in my room, anywhere, it would suddenly get me. I just found it so so sad. I didn't know Sam, at all really, just met him that once but I couldn't stop wondering why I had met him 4 days before he died. What got me most was how can someone be having a great time, their whole life ahead of them, then that.

About 2 days after I heard the news I went onto myspace and decided to see if he had a page. I was interested in finding out more about him. I'm not sure why but I decided to send his best friend (who I had never met in my life) a message to tell him about my meeting with Sam, the fact I had recent photos of him( if he wanted copies). This is what is quite good about myspace, you feel you can do things like that, it's all very easy. I didn't really expect a reply but somehow I felt so much better just sending the message. Chris replied really quickly and we exchanged emails.

Since that message we have spoken every day and become mates. It's been a bizarre situation that's made me think a lot about life and how there's just so many twists and turns round the corner.

Feeling ill...why not start a blog?

So I am here, on my bed feeling rough ( not alcohol related). I know I am not going to be able to sleep so I've decided to start a blog, as you do!

I also won't be able to sleep tonight as I have two tutorials back to back tomorrow to "discuss" my major photography project. I'm spending time with a woman obsessed with the royal family and who has the largest collection of memorabilia in the country. For tomorrow I have put together a slideshow with audio interview and some text. I'm quite pleased with what I have put together but feel, once again my lecturers will give me a bored look, say something I don't really want to hear and leave me feeling deflated. I know they don't mean it but hey, a little encouragement would be nice for a change.

Went to Spittalfields Market with Wei Wei today. She wanted curry for breakast, I had noodles (prob why I am feeling so dodgy). I had a coffee to drink, (have had about 10 cups of coffee today so am going to start smelling like a teacher if I am not careful!). After the market I wanted to go into the church near the market, it's massive and I just wanted to see what it was like inside (this interest probably stems from my mum dragging us into every church in France to light candles for relatives in my youth). Anyway, it's a really beautiful church and this little group were standing in the corner playing classical music. It was just really nice about 10 people just sitting watching. Then, this lovely moment was ruined by one of the party, a 60 year old woman, who started dancing like a maniac to the music by the alter. I waited for someone to stop her but then realised, to my horror, she was one of the group and this was all planned! All I could think of was Fatboy Slim's "Praise You" video. I caught the eye of one of the audience and we just smirked. I really wished my mates from back home were there to witness that moment, it was classic!